depression/greatsadness?

Post by **_Damon** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 2:51 am

Homer wrote:Hi Damon
Seems you might have made a bit of a leap there in assuming Friend/ Guest is troubled for his/her own sake. Someone I know very well has great empathy for the downtrodden but doesn't feel unworthy at all of being treated with respect.

Yours in Christ, Homer

I'm not so sure I made a leap, though. I often see things in people that others don't see so clearly. I've heard many people like Guest use similar language and voice similar complaints, and all the while their real issue was how the world treated them. I could be wrong about Guest, but I don't think so.

Yes, people can have great empathy for the downtrodden without feeling unworthy, but have you ever heard of the concept of the 'mirror'? For instance, what you like about someone is often the same thing you can see in yourself, whereas something you don't like about someone is often, once again, the very same thing you can see in yourself.

Homer, try naming three things you like in others and then ask yourself if that's the way you are. Then try it with three things you don't like in others. More often than not, you'll probably find that what you're seeing is a reflection of yourself.

I'm fairly sure that Guest is doing the same thing.

Damon

Post by **_Anonymous** » Mon Mar 28, 2005 2:03 pm

I hope Steve can respond to this as well as others..........

I have gone through a period of intense grief/loss.......
Yes, I at times wondered, "where is the LORD?" Not for long though
because I believe HIS word over my thoughts....

Question;

I have for the past 2 weeks or so been praying for the same people
and situations over my life/family. I feel these have been urgent requests
as well as praying to renew my mind. I plan to for at least 23 days before I move on because I have heard some say it takes that long to break a bad pattern/cycle of negative thinking.....Is this repetitious praying that bible warns against?

thank you.

Post by **_Steve** » Mon Mar 28, 2005 4:41 pm

First, to Damon:

Brother, this is not the first time you have exhibited an unjustifiable confidence in your intuitions about people's motives. I hate to speak so directly (and I don't know if I am alone in my reaction) but I personally find this irritating. When somebody tells you what is going on in their heart, and you insist that you know what is going on there better than they do, this is simply arrogant insensitivity on your part. You may feel that you have a gift of discernment, but it seems to me more like a gift of suspicion. Your "counsel" really amounts to an unsubstantiated accusation that the person is "subconsciously" thinking wrong thoughts. If the person is not conscous of these thoughts (that's what "subconscious" means), how have you become aware of them? This is a Bible forum, not a psycho-babble forum. I know you mean to help, but I do get annoyed when you do this psychoanalytical thing. Again, I may be alone in this reaction, and I'm not saying you can't continue doing it, but I wanted to register my complaint.

To believer/guest:

I do not quite understand what it is you are praying for. It sounds like there are a couple of continuing concerns, both for some people you care about and for your own sanctification. I believe in continuing in prayer (and sometimes fasting) for urgent matters, and I don't consider this to be the kind of "vain repetitions" that Jesus likened to the prayers of the heathen. Any prayer offered with godly motives, in faith, and in the name of Jesus is not "vain" even if it is repetitious.

I have family members that I have prayed for daily for many years. I have seen some movement in the hearts of some of them, but not in others. I intend to continue praying for them until the day I die, or my prayers are answered.

George Mueller was one of my mentors (even though he lived a century ago), and he prayed for the salvation of certain people every day for many decades. He lived to see most of them converted, but some of them were converted only after his death. While on earth, there is no more powerful or worthwhile activity that we can devote ourselves to than prayer. It is not vain to continue knocking, seeking, and asking. Men ought always to pray, and not to lose heart (Matt.7:7-8/ Luke 18:1-8).

Post by **_Anonymous** » Mon Mar 28, 2005 5:43 pm

I have not lost heart, amen.

GOD hears the SAME prayers from me daily................
Ocassionally, I slip in other prayers as I am being led.

I am happy I am not being repetitious.
thank you

Post by **_Damon** » Mon Mar 28, 2005 8:51 pm

Steve wrote:First, to Damon:

Brother, this is not the first time you have exhibited an unjustifiable confidence in your intuitions about people's motives. ...Your "counsel" really amounts to an unsubstantiated accusation that the person is "subconsciously" thinking wrong thoughts.

First of all, Steve, I'm not omniscient, so I don't know for sure what's in people's hearts. However, having personally known for several years a married couple who've gotten extremely depressed about world events, just as Guest has, but who were actually depressed about their own personal circumstances, I didn't feel that my question to Guest was out of line. Secondly, am I asking for the purpose of judging and accusing, or for the purpose of trying to help? Which is it?

You may get irritated at me for asking what seem to you to be prying questions, but I get irritated at you for ascribing evil motives where there are none. So, why don't we just drop the pointless judgmentalism here?

Damon

Post by **_Rae** » Tue Mar 29, 2005 6:24 pm

Damon,

I don't think the issue was you asking a question to "guest," but you then answering the question for them...

The question you asked...

"Guest, do you believe that you are worthy of people treating you with dignity and respect? Of not treading you down like dirt?"

The answer you gave for them...

"The answer you gave me tells me that you subconsciously don't believe you're worthy! And therefore, you keep creating those circumstances to happen to you. The reason that you feel depressed for the people in the world that suffer cruelty is that you feel that the world has treated you cruelly."

That also seems to me as an accusation, whether you meant it to be or not. There is nothing wrong with the original question, but it was assuming you already knew the answer that Steve was pointing out.

Post by **_Anonymous** » Tue Mar 29, 2005 8:01 pm

Let's not take offense at one another we are brothers and sisters in CHRIST....... I think Damon's heart was right and I took NO offense.
Sometimes we are zealous to help and because we dont know one another personally, we cannot always understand that person's motives..
Let there be no divisons among us!!!

Guest

Post by **_Damon** » Tue Mar 29, 2005 9:35 pm

Thank you Guest. And by the way, I wish you all the best in overcoming your depression, whether it's about what's going on in the world or about what's going on in your own life - or both. In my experience, doing something for someone else is usually the best cure for depression that I know of.

I know that I'm personally very upset over what's happening with Terri Schiavo. I'm happy that there are people willing to stand up for what's right, though - like Judge Greer's own pastor, who told him that what he's doing is wrong. He took a stand where few others in authority would.

Damon

Post by **_Anonymous** » Wed Mar 30, 2005 10:01 pm

Damon,

I understand how you feel about Terry S. Personally, it has not bothered me as much as some other things happening world wide....
I suppose when I first wrote the message on great sadness I was feeling
very sad about so much hate and oppression against the weak. My heart aches for her family and the pain this entire tradgedy has brought........

Come quickly LORD JESUS!