Jason wrote:A solution would be to feel comfortable meeting and having fellowship with new folks. Have you arrived at that place of comfort yet?
I think that I have in most situations. I can understand how you feel about the superficiality of social gatherings. I agree that the way most people handle these situations is mere socializing and profits everyone involved very little aside from entertainment. Granted, sometimes a little human contact is quite encouraging. Especially, when someone is overwhelmed with troubles and needs someone who can relate to them. However, I don't generally think of that as fellowship in its most edifying form. I find social interactions to be most satisfying when I feel I've laid some groundwork to really being of service to the people I've interacted with.
To that end, I think the advice your friend gave is quite good. Asking questions and listening to the answers is a great way to survive social situations. However, beyond mere survival, that technique is a great way to learn how you can genuinely help people, serving Christ in the process. The tricky parts are knowing what questions to ask and perhaps even more so, appreciating just how much of an impact such an approach to servitude can have for the Kingdom and one's own relationship to Christ. Those are things I'm still learning to appreciate, but it seems I'm reminded almost daily how small impacts made with humility over time can cumulate into significant gains, for time and for eternity.
There are some great tools to help with these items if you truly feel the Spirit leading you to modify your approach. However, as others have alluded to, God uses all sorts of personality types to accomplish His purposes. Engaging lots of people is not a prerequisite for carrying out God's will for your life and quantity is no substitute for quality.