Left my church... looking for Portland, OR area Christians

[jaydam]

Last week I found myself having to leave my church for numerous reasons. We are on different pages when it comes to salvation, the appearance of the Christian life, the role of the church, the role of the pastor, tithing and sowing in faith to receive blessing (especially material return), etc. were some of the issues. While these issues generally simmered below the surface, one or another always seemed to be popping up as an area of contention which ended up with social exclusion.

More major things in my book included the guy who went out to get wasted on Friday and Saturday nights, posted his adventures from the bar and with women on Facebook, and then was allowed to participate in serving communion on Sunday mornings along with having other spiritual rolls.

I tried to work around it all, believing that I could be an influencer of change given my story of conversion from the stereotypical bad-boy background of drugs, alcohol, sleeping around, biker gang associations, violent behavior, etc. to hearing the audible voice of God, and leaving everything in an instant (not to say all the change was easy). My empowered living could be an example of what salvation is... yet, I was continually considered to be the unique experience, while the norm was considered to be salvation of soul, but the possibility of a life relatively unchanged at first.

Thus, a year after coming into the church a guy can still be in continual defeat with his fight with alcohol, peer pressure, etc. He believes he is saved by grace, but he does not understand he must also have Christ as Lord and he has been empowered to live accordingly (although imperfectly at times). I could go on with my observation of weakly birthed "Christians" who experience a life of continual defeat compared to my experience, and what I believe should be the general experience, but I'll leave it at this for now. It pained me to see the guy a year later still struggling, believing he had full Christianity.

In some ways, I don't even blame the guy who served communion (mentioned above), as a degree of the responsibility I believe falls on the church.

Despite it all, I hung in there, hoping to rub off and change things. I didn't know anything about the Bible 3 years ago when I got saved, but I knew my experience and wanted it to spread in my church. It hasn't really.

Now onto a few weeks ago as my wife and I are looking to start a family. While we as strong Christians felt like we could hang in there at our church and try to lead by example, we asked ourselves if this was the church we wanted our malleable children to grow up in. It did not mean we weren't willing to train our child to hold strong to what we tell him, but did we want him to be fighting in the church as well as in the world to hold onto the believes we would give him? The immediate answer was no, we want a church that is a safe and restful place for his believes to grow.

Additionally, we do not want our child growing up in the laser-light and smoke show that is the youth "clubbing" environment of the church. One that I feel emulates so many things from the background I escaped. By the time my child is a young adult (13-16ish), I would hope he is about much more than the weekly parties where the church tries as hard as it can to dress up its teaching in coolness and distraction.

Anyway, suffice it to say, while my wife and I were hanging in there as long as we could, the thought of subjecting our child to the environment of a church where it seems salvation is weaker than it should be, and the pull of the bar and the world is greater was too much for us.

All this to not only bemoan the current state of what seems to be many of today's churches, but to find out where the others are from the Portland area who are struggling with the mainstream churches. I believe a woman called Steve last week from Portland who was saying she was looking for the fellowship of a better church.

You guys want to hangout together? I have a meeting place for up to 25 people...

P.S. Please don't think I am bitter, I really am not, rather my heart goes out to all people, and I love them all. That is why my heart hurts when the guy mentioned above who is saved and is also in bondage to alcohol and worldly pressure still, yet he is religiously giving his tithe, sowing his money, and participating in the annual fasting as he is looking for more. I don't believe that is what Christ really meant by having hope. I am not bitter, rather I have come home many times after church and cried for such people. However, I find the problem to be to exclusion that comes when I am first not seen as a conformer in one area when I do not tithe or sow seed money, yet I am called a legalist when I question if the Christian life should hold an expectation of something more than what was evident in my church's new converts. I would be happy to fellowship with tithers, seed money sowers, etc., if they would be just as willing to fellowship with me and allow me my opinion. Also, if there was the presence of a more empowered Christianity that could truly break the bondage of sin and death.

[TheEditor]

Hi Jaydam,

Congratulations for taking a principled stand! Now the hard part, being viewed as a pariah. But that's okay, the best of us are...

I am in the Seattle area, so too far to be of any help, but I'm sure the word will get out here fast!

Regards, Brenden.

[Homer]

Hi Jaydam,

Have you heard of the Celebrate recovery program? We have it at our church (about 80 mi. south of Portland) and it ministers to people from the addiction/bad habit life. It is run by a husband/wife team who sound like they come from a similar background to yours (they still ride motorcycles). They have their meetings on Friday nights at the church which include dinner, worship, etc. Numerous volunteers help out with everything from food prep to childcare (more than 20 kids each week). Several of the recovery people are in church each Sunday.

Anyway, you might want to be involved with a church that serves in this way. You can google "Celebrate Recovery" and read about the program. There is a church listed in Portland with this program:

As Is Church
15150 NE Gilsan
Portland, OR
Contact: Tony Reese
(503)960-7428

God bless, Homer

[jaydam]

Thanks guys.

Thanks for the encouragement Editor. We'll see how things work out.

Homer, I've heard of CR. Unfortunately, my problem goes deeper than just finding a church with a recovery program.

Anyway, I've setup a weekly Friday night meeting in the Portland area, and I have about 10-15 people who are going to be coming. It will be interesting to see what it morphs into.

Also, Steve, if you are ever in the Portland area, I should have a meeting place I can get for you for free that will hold about 25. I know it is probably too small, but I thought I'd throw it out there.

[Choosethisday]

Jaydam, sorry I didn't see this sooner. I live in Camas, (just east of Vancouver), I know people in many of the churches in the Portland /Vancouver area so if I can be of any help let me know. What area of Portland do you live in?
Don

[jaydam]

Thanks, I live in W Portland (217 & 26 - if you know the area). I have a few promising leads on a couple churches, but I am open to other suggestions.

My biggest pet peeve in the searching is that the "mega" churches seem to have a monopoly on the google searches. Thus, while I would like to find a community church or even a home church, the results I find doing online searches are dominated by the 2-3 mega churches in the area. So I am very open to word of mouth.

[steve]

Hi Jaydam,

I am overdue for a visit to the Portland Area. I should schedule a weekend to come up there soon. I would be glad to use your venue. If it seems too small, it might be better to only announce it here at the forum, and by word of mouth, rather than over the air. I'll have to give it some consideration. I'd enjoy meeting you, Brother. I appreciate the way you think.

[jaydam]

Sounds good Steve. Just let me know when you figure out the dates you'll be here. I'm looking forward to it!

[psimmond]

Hi jaydam,
I don't attend a Calvary Chapel but I've visited them in the past and been quite impressed. And I think they are quite plentiful out west. Of course like every denomination, individual churches can vary.

[jaydam]

I went to a Calvary Chapel in Hawaii and loved it, then I just tried the one near me and immediately knew it wasn't for me.

Besides that, I'd really like to find a church that is not part of a church proliferation system as you then seem to always run into "party lines." I've found that some of those styles of churches want you to take their classes and sign various statements before one can serve at even a minimal level. My hope is to find just a simple, independent, single church.