The Narrow Path Ministries

Question: Do lustful THOUGHTS give one grounds for divorce?

If someone were to ask me that question my response would be "no" because it was not PHYSICALLY acted on.

I would only be giving my personal conviction

I do not know how to backup that with scripture

What if they responded that God looks at the HEART

and also how Jesus considered such thoughts as ADULTERY

At that point I would be stumped and retreat to my personal opinion that God doesn't like divorce etc.

How would you refute this?

Jesus never said that "adultery" was grounds for divorce—as if "adultery in [the] heart " (Matt.5:28) might qualify. The only grounds for divorce that He identified was "fornication" (Matt.5:32)—a word referring to sexual activities, not thoughts.

If one could be divorced for having adulterous thoughts, it would be as reasonable to execute a man for having murderous thoughts (Matt.5:21-22; 1 John 3:15).

The fact that only God can see the heart should tip us off that it is His unique province to judge the heart. The courts (and other human inquisitors) cannot rightly punish a person for his/her thoughts. Though some thoughts are sins, only actual actions can be criminal, and therefore punishable by man.

This is why the idea of assigning increased criminal penalties for so-called "hate crimes" is so ominous. It creates a pseudo-legitimate role in society for thought-police.

If lustful thoughts were grounds for divorce, and hateful thoughts were grounds for capital punishment, every marriage would be vulnerable, and every human would be subject to hanging.

Great answer Steve, that makes sense - thanks!