Christian Relationships...

[_faydawg67117]

How does church disipline play out in our friendships with fellow Christians? Should we cut people off if they are living in sin and at what point? Or is that just the churches job? Also, how would this work in familial relationships? Say a relative who is a Christian is in sin and is unrepentant. Do you disown them?

Thanks,
Brian

[Guest]

This is not meant as a way to start an argument but is meant simply as a question answering a question--Can an unrepentent person living in sin be considered a disciple of Christ? If we answer that first, I think we can answer your other questions with scriptural examples.

kind regards,

livingink

[_faydawg67117]

Someone I know used to walk with the Lord and now is living in sin and unrepentant. It brings me down to be around this person. Is it loving for me to not hang out with them or should I allow myself to be discouraged. Also, is it scriptural to not hang with this person. That is all I want to know. I don't know what is the biblical thing to do and I'm confused about it all. And to answer your question, this person was a disciple.

[Guest]

Personally I am not so legalistic that I would disfellowship from anyone. How can one return fully unless there is someone to aid in that return to faith. This is how I address this type of issue.

[Guest]

I had a friend one time that got into some trouble with the law. He had two sets of friends. One at church and from the Christian School that we graduated from, and one set that was "going wild", as it were. When it happened, just about everyone at the church "cut him off", so to speak. It was a real "thank God I'm not like that" kind of moment with parents competing in a "prayer" meeting about how far they could keep their kids away from him. When all his Christian friends went holy and judgemental on him, the only support he had left (other than me) were the friends that had got him into trouble to begin with. You can guess how that turned out. This guy went from a trusted worker with youth at the church to someone who has not been to a church service other than his sister's wedding and his mom's funeral in 25 years.
D.

[Guest]

Pride and the "holier than thou" attitudes work both ways. What people do shouldn't keep you from doing the right thing.

[_faydawg67117]

Holier than thou attitude! I guess I'm holier than thou than. Well, if you went to church in the south bronx (like me) and seen lives restored from the worst of situations and now see them back in the pit they came from you would be discouraged too! I wouldn't care as much as I do if the main person I'm talking about and there child weren't my best friends as a Christian. In all honesty I'm drained and more than me my wife is. If it is at all possible this situation could hurt our walk with God than I'm going to remove myself from it. Jesus ministered to prostitutes but I wouldn't recomend it to the average man because most men lust. I too don't think I should surround myself with these peoples sins if they are my weaknesses. The proper response I should get is "I'll pray for you; thats a tough situation." or "this is what the word has to say about that." Maybe I read scripture wrongly but doesn't Paul say that we are not to associate with those who call themselves Christian but are living in sin. If I misunderstood something I'm seeking an answer on this forum. Help a brother out. The very same thing I'm being accused of is what you guys are doing to me. I want answers not to be made to feel like I'm being legalistic or holier than thou by any one here.

[_faydawg67117]

Also, I have been friends with this person for YEARS since they stopped attending church and have been living in sin. It's been awhile and I'm drained.
Just so we are clear. I am the least legalistic person you'll ever meet. But, I don't use my Christian liberty as an excuse to sin. I desire to live a holy life. You guys should see me; let's just say legalistic would not be the word that comes to your mind when you first look at me. lol. And if you hung out with me it would be even further from your mind.
This is what I get for spilling my guts on the internet. What else should I expect?
Oh, if I was vague and you guys misunderstood me I apologize. However, ask questions next time before you throw some accusations at someone.

[Guest]

I don't know, the only thing I can think of concerning what Paul said is that he was addressing, maybe, the corporate church. The body of believers in that area. I think that Paul would be the first to go out of his way to help a brother out of sin but in order to keep the local body of believers sanctified, maybe the church (localized) as a whole must not let the sinful man (or woman) back in until he or she has found repentance.

This is obviously a confusing issue. We are all different in our relationship to the Lord. We have all been given our own measure of faith. If we were, individually, to walk away from a brother in need and who seems responsive to repentence, then who else would be there for him? It may sometimes take us being on his doorstep many times instead of waiting to see if he walks back through the doors of the church building in repentence. That would be the ideal thing but because emotions and maybe character flaws that are within that person, as they are within us all, that may hinder him to return even when he want to, I would then rather see a friend be instrumental in the return of a brother rather than the whole body.

I think we need to start practicing the "love your neighbor as yourself" command a little closer. I believe Paul also taught that not just one should engage the sinning brother but two should so as to avoid the temptation to sin yourself.

I'm not trying to teach anyone anything new here, I am just engaging in the conversation.

[Guest]

However, ask questions next time before you throw some accusations at someone.

Simmer down there tiger. I believe we were simply sharing our own personal take on the situation. Not as a judgement. I only saw people sharing how they may handle a situation as such.