A Christian School's Role In Disciplining/Shepherding Childr
Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2015 4:25 pm
We have a friend who is experiencing some challenges in their school's over-reaction to their child's behavior -- one which has exhibited in some rather troubling physical manifestations of emotional distress in their child. The school seems to have a not uncommon dogmatic approach to discipline.
I am interested in views, particularly from Christian educators, of the school's role in disciplining a child.
In particular, I see two main approaches, differing primarily on emphasis but with dramatically different real world implications: (1) disciplining primarily for behavior modification to maintain a learning envioronment balanced with Christian moral teaching and discipleship through helping the kids appreciate the sin component where appropriate in support of a Christian family's shepherding of a child; and (2) a more Calvinistic approach along the lines of Tripp's Shepherding a Child's Heart where the school sees behavior as secondary and seeing it not as sin itself but instead seeing it as a symptom of underlying sin where its primary role is in identifying those sin issues. Here, instead of focusing on the behavior, the focus is on the sin.
The latter seems like the role of a parent to me along a long and gentle path filled with grace while the former seems to be the appropriate role for the school. In the end, I suppose it's a matter of balance and perspective. The problem with the Calvinistic tendencies of those embracing the second seems to me to be that they tend to lack any sense of balance and recognition that behavior in children is not ALWAYS and COMPLETELY a result of an underlying sin condition (at least other than that common to all men). I know from experience (mine included) that some kids have different temperaments apart from sin and have impulse control or body movement challenges unrelated to sinfulness while other kids have no problem being outwardly completely compliant while having really dark sinful inner thoughts and resentments that aren't seen by their outward behavior.
I have heard Christian educators suggest that they can and should judge a child's heart from the fruit they exhibit in their classroom behavior and that their role is dealing primarily with the heart issue and where that can't be reached, to expel or suspend, particularly if parents can't acknowledge the sin issues even where they acknowledge the inappropriate or even sinful behaviors themselves.
Personally, I think this is related to a broader question of the role of sin-focused discipleship vs. obedience-focused discipleship generally. One criticism of Tripp's approach I've read seems to suggest focusing on sin is backwards, and that once we realize we are sinners in need of God, we should focus on pleasing him through our obedience, recognizing that as we do so and learn to walk in the Spirit our obedience will come easier and more naturally.
So, a larger question is should we seek to point out the sinful heart behind wrong behavior or remind what God says about our behavior? I suspect there's a balance here that's healthy. Too much emphasis on one...
Any thoughts or resources? All I can seem to find is secular stuff or the Tripp-based stuff.
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I am interested in views, particularly from Christian educators, of the school's role in disciplining a child.
In particular, I see two main approaches, differing primarily on emphasis but with dramatically different real world implications: (1) disciplining primarily for behavior modification to maintain a learning envioronment balanced with Christian moral teaching and discipleship through helping the kids appreciate the sin component where appropriate in support of a Christian family's shepherding of a child; and (2) a more Calvinistic approach along the lines of Tripp's Shepherding a Child's Heart where the school sees behavior as secondary and seeing it not as sin itself but instead seeing it as a symptom of underlying sin where its primary role is in identifying those sin issues. Here, instead of focusing on the behavior, the focus is on the sin.
The latter seems like the role of a parent to me along a long and gentle path filled with grace while the former seems to be the appropriate role for the school. In the end, I suppose it's a matter of balance and perspective. The problem with the Calvinistic tendencies of those embracing the second seems to me to be that they tend to lack any sense of balance and recognition that behavior in children is not ALWAYS and COMPLETELY a result of an underlying sin condition (at least other than that common to all men). I know from experience (mine included) that some kids have different temperaments apart from sin and have impulse control or body movement challenges unrelated to sinfulness while other kids have no problem being outwardly completely compliant while having really dark sinful inner thoughts and resentments that aren't seen by their outward behavior.
I have heard Christian educators suggest that they can and should judge a child's heart from the fruit they exhibit in their classroom behavior and that their role is dealing primarily with the heart issue and where that can't be reached, to expel or suspend, particularly if parents can't acknowledge the sin issues even where they acknowledge the inappropriate or even sinful behaviors themselves.
Personally, I think this is related to a broader question of the role of sin-focused discipleship vs. obedience-focused discipleship generally. One criticism of Tripp's approach I've read seems to suggest focusing on sin is backwards, and that once we realize we are sinners in need of God, we should focus on pleasing him through our obedience, recognizing that as we do so and learn to walk in the Spirit our obedience will come easier and more naturally.
So, a larger question is should we seek to point out the sinful heart behind wrong behavior or remind what God says about our behavior? I suspect there's a balance here that's healthy. Too much emphasis on one...
Any thoughts or resources? All I can seem to find is secular stuff or the Tripp-based stuff.
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk